My job is to take large documents and dumb them down for people who make five times my salary. The following is an example of a sentence I had to rewrite. Yes, it really is only one sentence. It was written by people who make ten times my salary:
"It shall be unlawful for any person to lease or make a sale or contract for sale of goods, wares, merchandise, machinery, supplies, or other commodities, or services, whether patented or unpatented, for use, consumption, enjoyment, or resale, or fix a price charged therefor, or discount from, or rebate upon, such price, on the condition, agreement, or understanding that the lessee or purchaser thereof shall not use or deal in the goods, wares, merchandise, machinery, supplies, or other commodity or services of a competitor or competitors of the lessor or seller, where the effect of such lease, sale, or contract for such sale or such condition, agreement, or understanding may be to substantially lessen competition or tend to create a monopoly in any line of commerce."
I'm not going to get into the irony of it all. I just wish I knew what I wanted to do for a living.
FYI- Here's the finalized, edited version:
"Don't jeopardize our free market economy! Moron! And quit paying people smarter than you to write your laws!"
2 comments:
Just quit and make your wife earn the bacon for a little bit. Then, you could hone your ping-pong skillz and join the US olympic team...or just travel around Asia for a while sharking unsuspecting swindlers in the ping pong halls.
Man, I'd never do that in Asia. Even the least of their kind could whip me at my greatest. I'd have to travel to Canada or something.
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