Americans are fat. Fat and lazy. And we always want more of our most precious commodity: time.
While Jon and I sat around the campfire last weekend watching the kids play together, we found a solution to both of those problems. The interesting thing we noticed about these young uns was that they just run everywhere. It doesn't matter where they're going, they are running to get there. They ran just for the sake of running. So we starting thinking, "Why don't we run anymore?" I ask you the same question.
Think of the many problems this would improve, if not completely solve.
1) Annoying people who take to long to cross the street would get done faster.
2) Food service would be faster.
3) Nobody would look stupid running to catch a flight at the airport.
4) There wouldn't be that long awkward silence as you pass by the drunk who keeps begging you for money.
5) There also wouldn't be a need for the casual "How you doin?" and "Good Morning" that nobody is really sincere about anyways.
6) Pick-pocketing would almost cease to exist.
7) People would finally realize how useless the Segway is.
8) Women would be less likely to buy high heel shoes, which could have enormous positive repercussions on our quality of life.
9) Fat men (myself included) who sweat and are out of breath when ascending a flight of stairs would fit in.
10) Feel free to add your own to the list.
The long term benefits would be an increase in health and an increase in time. Which solves our original problem of Americans being fat and not having time.
Also, as mankind got faster and healthier, we would run for longer distances at a faster pace. This would mean eliminating taking the car on short trips to the grocery. Everyone would just own their own shopping cart and run the groceries home. That would cut down on our oil dependency and take money away from terrorists. As we evolved, we may even become faster than horses and eventually airplanes. I don’t need to tell you how great that would be.
The only problem I can foresee is that everyone needs to start running at the same time. I can’t be the only guy out there running, or that would just look stupid.