Friday, December 22, 2006

ASSAFASSA: The Next Great Word Game

Phil and I have just finished a project of sorts. We've developed a word game that stemmed from an inside joke involving the word, "Assafassa." I encourage you all to join in the fun, as it is sure to increase your IQ. Or at least your vocabulary. For the letters "a" and "s."

What we've done is told an entire story where each word in a line must start with the corresponding "Assafassa" letter. We would each write one line in the story, alternating turns for the last two or three months. We tried to limit the use of proper names, as they could easily be invented to fit the mold. I think we may have also invented a word or two.

Anyways, below you can read our story in its entirety. I've only changed a bit of the punctuation and given it a title. Phil started the story and I think I wrote the last line. Please feel free to start your own "Assafassa" in the comments section. I will respond to anyone who keeps this going. Have fun!

ASSAFASSA: Sunnis' Last Stand

Already, Susan Sutherbert, accounting firm associate, sounded surprisingly accosted.

Astounded, Sally Strothers asked for a sordid story affirmation.

“Alright!” shouted Susan, “Albert found several suspects alive.

After someone stabbed Albert, finally agents suspected something awful.”

“And?” solicited Sally. “After finally arriving she…she…ahhhhh!”

As Sally Strothers attempted futilely at speaking something, another

announcement startled Susan. “Arrange four armed soldiers Southside and

attack smelly Sunnis at Fort Ass-Sumter.” Somehow, arranging

attackers seems slightly alluring. “Fag.” Announced Susan, “Sunnis always

assume someone soon attacks forcefully.” Acting somewhat stunned, an…

almond skinned soldier approached. “First Albert? Second Susan? And…
(I wonder if this is how children’s stories are written.)

already Sally seems almost frightened at something scary. Alright…

anyone see suspicious agents from a secret service airplane…

ask special soldiers about fighting after said suspicious agents

are seen.” Sally almost fainted. “Are special soldiers accurate?”

“Ask stupid sentences again Freak, and someone’s skull assuredly…

awaits severe squashing.” Again fear approached Susan. “So, Albert…

already someone stated a false argument, supposing secret agents

are sad snipers. Already forget Action Seventy Seven? Any

assholes seen standing around farting, are surely shot against…”

“Alright!” Sally shifted awkwardly, fearing atrocity. “Sunnis should account

about seven...” “Stop!” Albert fearfully and suddenly shouted. “Attaboy…

ace!” Sumter soldiers attacked, fearing a settlement so audacious…
(I think that we are on two different pages of brain…)

anything stopping sure advancement for all, seemed so atrocious.
(I was thinking that after you pulled the seventy seven?)

Away, somewhere secret, Albert’s findings are secured. Soon, anyone…

awaiting specific sounds at Fort, are shot, slain and..

assaulted. Slowly, sunrise awakes. Forest adorningly sheaths several army…

assailants. Silently, scouts arrive from a secret stealth army

aircraft. Sergeant Sunnis approaches, flaunting appendages sickeningly stolen amid

acrid souls. “So,” a foolhardy army soldier said, “already…

activating secret separation accomplishment?” “Fu_ _ ing ass!” said Sunnis.

asking someone such a freaking asinine statement. Should anyone…

assume such sketches already, fairy artard, senatorial sanctions are…

a sure sent action.” Forgetting all sensible signs, an…

arrogant soldier stumbles ahead. Fretful and suspicious, Sunnis attempts…

a secret soliloquy, and forgets about soldiers sneaking around.

Attempting sudden surprise, a foreign assailant sneaks stealthily around

and sees Sunnis. “Aha! Fool!” announces Sunnis, sticking shotguns at

assailant. “Stealth sure ain’t foremost among some snails. Attack!”

All Sunnis’ soldiers attacked forcefully and severely stunned all

adversaries. Several severed appendages fell among Sunnis’ soldiers. Amazingly,

a Shinto shaman appeared floating above several soldiers, attaching

amassed soldier’s shocked attention. Formally, a stunned Sunnis approached

asking, “Shaman, suppose all freakish appendages somehow sprung alive

and systematically started attacking forts? Are Shinto societies adept

at special sacrilegious attacks?” For a second, Sunnis awaited.

As suspenseful seconds accumulate, fire absorbs surrounding structure. Aghast,

a soldier speaks. “Allow for a small soldier’s asinine

analysis. Surveying scenes, as foreboding as such, seems awful

absurd. See? Smoldering afar, fire annihilates structures. Still, all

anxiously stay. Such a fear aforementioned shaman solicits annihilates

all.” Stupidly, Sunnis asks for a sequential survey, allowing

a solitary soldier ample freedom apart. “So, shaman, are

all severed soldiers affixed?” “Fool! A shaman shouldn’t always

adhere such simpleton’s appeals! Forget acquaintances suffering senselessly and

act sensibly!” Sunnis ached forlornly at such strict advice.

“And,” started Sunnis, “after forgetting associates, some solicitations are

annulled!” Sunnis stared at forty appendages. “Shaman, sir? Allow

analysis situationally.” Sunnis appeared frightened as silent shaman approached.

“Alright Sunnis. Some appendages finally are sealed. So, action

accomplished. Suspend silence and finish announcements.” So, Sunnis attempted

another speech. “Soldiers! Already freakish accidents stymied sure advancement.

Any soldiers seen abruptly failing assignments shall successfully acquire

a solid shoe adequately forced at said soldiers’ ass.

Anyway, shadowy sagas are further ahead. Since Shinto’s are

absurdly stupid, stop awaiting future acts. Soldiers, strike at

allotted signal. Seeking awaiting fighters, as shall surely accompany

all strategic strongholds.” A fog amassed. Soldiers silently advanced.

Aircraft surveyed Shinto’s. Abnormally, fortresses appeared suspiciously sparse. Assembled

artillery seemed somehow alone. “Forward!” A stunned Sunnis announced.

As surprising solitude appeared foreboding, a single Shinto assailant

approached. “Sirs, simply allow for a single soldier’s advice:

Along such sanctuary, armies forbidden are slaughtered simply as

a slimy slug. A formidable army surely struggles also.

Advising senseless soldiers against fighting always seems slightly amusing

albeit, stupendously stupid. A forewarning: allow senseless soldiers advancement,

and surely sentence all.” Forgoing advice, Sunnis straightly aims

at Shinto soldier’s ass. “Forget advice! Sundry soldiers, attack!!!!!!!”

Astonished, Shinto’s summon a fiery airborne spirit surrounding all.

“Aw Shit!” screamed a frightened and stupefied Sunnis. Admiringly,

a stupid soldier attempted feeling, as scorching seemed almost

assured. Sunnis surveyed around, forgetting about saving soldiers. Amazingly,

a steady stream atop fiery adversary started. Startled, annoyed,

all Sunni’s soldiers attempted flight. A scared Sunnis angrily…

aimed shouldered shotgun and fired. A scrambling soldier, awestruck,

announced, “Soldiers, stop! Attack forcefully, as Sunnis sheepishly attempts!”

Atop shell shock, all feared a Sunnis snipe and

aggressively, synchronizingly, stormed a fort. And somehow, sadly, although

attempts seemed sanguine, all fought a skirmish slightly apprehensively.

Against struggles, setbacks, and fury, all Sunni’s soldiers anguished.

All stout soldiers appeared flustered as Sunnis’ surrender appeared

a surety. Slowly, a frustrated and scared Sunnis approached.

Addressing soldiers, “Shinto’s apparently fight as supers sumo’s and

are surely spanking all fighters. All surviving soldiers are

adequate; since surviving annihilation. Families and spouses surely are

alright.” Sad, Sunnis arises, finding a sword. Stabbing an

ailing Shinto silent, acting frigidly audacious, Sunnis surprises all

and stabs Sunnis. All feel a sudden serenity and

awe. Sunnis’ sacrifice, albeit foolish, accomplishes Shinto surrender. Although

a silent soldier attempted futile attacks, Shinto soldiers appeared

aptly secure. Suggestions arose for accomplishing surrender. Shinto’s aren’t

accepting surrendering soldiers. All fear a slaughter. So, as

another surge starts, all flee. Again, Shinto shaman appears

as soldiers stumble across fields. Amazed, soldiers stop and

await sentencing. Slowly, arising figures appear, surpassing staggered audience

and sifting slowly among fallen and scared soldiers. Acting

astonished, soldiers shrieked and faked as stiffs. Shaman, apparently

also scared shitless, announced, “Forget attacking!” Soon soldiers, aware

and still stupid, asked forgiveness as shaman started amassing

all surrendering soldiers. A full and sordid slaughter annihilated

about sixty strong, almost fully abolishing Sunnis’ solid army.

As souls soared above, fights all stopped. Sally and

a scarlet Susan appeared. Fearing all, Susan suddenly advanced

And swords struck. A fallen and shocked Susan announced,

“Anarchy seems sensible, although, fortunately, all should sense another…”

As Susan slowly attempted finishing, a sullen Sally attacked.

Apparently, several spirits attached forcefully and Sally, senselessly aggravated

appeared soulless, striking at foes and Susan. Soon, all

around surrounded Sally. About fifty armed Shinto’s struck and

as Sally seemed aggravated, forgetting about Susan, she attempted

aerial suspension. She almost forgot all stunned staring and

appropriately said, “Shit!” A fierce arrow struck Susan and

amused soulless Sally. A foot away, shaman sneak attacks

as Susan’s soul alights. Finding all soldiers sacked, an

awful stench suspends, and fearlessly aggravated Sally shoots an

auspicious soldier’s sideburns. Amazed, fellow awed soldiers start an

applaud surrounding Sally. Arrogantly, flirting and softening, she absentmindedly…

adores Shinto soldiers. A fighter admonishes Sally, “Seductress! All

admirations should start at first at shaman. Since after

all, Shaman sees all. Forget all soldiers, seduce an

authoritative Shaman. Surely, all feel and sense sexuality. After

a sultry Shaman, accosting fumbling army soldiers, seems an

attractively sickening situation. Able females are situationally sent as

appropriate sacrifices.” Stopping a full and stupendous speech, able

army soldiers straighten. A furious and stifled shaman arises

and says, “Soldiers, all fighters are subdued. Sure and

accurate strikes stymied adversaries forever. At seven, she arrives

and she serves ale. For all splurging soldiers, an

ale seemed satisfactory. A festive air seemed satisfying, although

a sad service acknowledging fallen acquaintances shall start around

a sober send-off and fire. All sensed Sunnis around

as slaughter subdued all foreign attackers,” shaman stuttered as

a strange sensation accosted. From a soldiers’ standpoint, alit

against soft sunlight, a figure arose, standing still. All…

attending stood still as feverishly approaching strode Sunnis. An

apparition, Sunnis’ soul addressed fighters all. “Sirs, soldiers, adversaries

anyone still surviving, a frivolous affair should surely arise

all suspicion. Still, as frightful as souls seem, allay

all senseless superstitions. All fear, and some send affirmative

actions, suppressing souls’ anger. Forget all such superstitiousness. Arise,

and shine! Should any fortuitous adversary strike, save another

adolescent.” So, Sunnis appeared foggy and slowly shimmered away.


Anonymous said...

As Scruff shits, a few abnormal sounds start accumulating...

Arthur said...

and someone says, "A fart always smells shitty as...

Phil said...

after sultry spongebaths." Appalled, former apologetics sniff scornfully around...

Arthur said...

apparently seeking some answer for a sickeningly-scented ass.

Phil said...

"Absolutely shocking!" signaling a forboding armwave, silently suspecting atomic...

Arthur said...

ass-stench, scientist Alfonso Fernando almost succumbed, suffering abysmally...