All Dogs Go To Heaven

I can remember when I was a kid watching movies, I would always be way more upset about dogs being killed than I would about humans. Movies like Old Yeller and Turner and Hootch may have scarred me for life. Perhaps I've gotten numb to seeing people die in films; so when a dog dies, that affects me more than people do. I'm not sure. It just seems wrong to me when dogs die. I can't explain it.

So all this to say, my folks are putting down their dog today. Suzi lived a long life and definitely had three feet in the grave. So today will be her last day. It's a good day to die. I don't know how old she is, but she spent the past two years or so with my parents. I'm not too sad about it, cause she was a mean old bitch. My wife was downright happy when I told her. But it is sad for my parents. And I'm sure G-Anne (the original owner) will spend some time mourning today. But at least Suzi's going down before some disease or something worse puts her in too much pain.

So, I went to the folks for lunch today to pay my last respects. While waiting for my mom to get home, I noticed the following story on Indystar:

Puppy set on fire in Michigan City

Associated Press

MICHIGAN CITY, Ind. -- A 4-month-old puppy, possibly doused with gasoline, was set on fire and had to be put to sleep because of severe burns, police said.

"Obviously, we're very concerned. It's a heinous crime committed by someone who has a lot of problems," Assistant Police Chief John Kintzele said Wednesday.

A neighbor said she was smoking a cigarette on her front porch about 1 a.m. Wednesday and saw what appeared to be a dog on fire running across the street. The woman called police, and officers found the badly burned pit bull coming out of some bushes.
The animal's owner, Andrea Davis, said her dog, Snoopy, had been on a leash tied to a stake in her fenced back yard.

"I thought this was a nice neighborhood," said Davis, who moved there about two months ago. "I don't want another dog if I can't keep him in the back yard. He was a real good dog. I wouldn't have traded him for the world."

A search of the area led officers to a nearby shed, where they found a gasoline can.

What a sick, sick bastard. For some reason this disgusted me more than the millions of other filthy things going on in our world. Maybe because I'm numb to the other crap. But who does this to a 4-month old puppy? Named Snoopy at that. And tied up in the backyard. Bastard. What a sick world.

Anyways, hopefully dogs do go to heaven. They deserve it more than we do.

So in honor of today's events, I'm going to share one of my all time favorite short stories. It's by Stephen Crane and it's called A Dark-Brown Dog. It really is amazingly written, but if you know Stephen Crane, you'll know what to expect. It's worth five minutes if you can spare the time: A Dark-Brown Dog.

Colts Win, Go 3-0

Before we get all giddy about the Colts winning another divisional road game and going 3-0, let's look at the bad side. Freaking special teams. The worst thing about that stupid opening kick return was that it came after an offsides penalty on the kickoff. Offsides? On a kickoff? I mean, seriously. What the heck! That was terrible. Another stupid penalty against our defense when Houston was facing 4th and 1 led to points on the board.

Houston is good this year. Imagine this scenario: Colts home game against defending champion, oh let's say Patriots. Marvin Harrison is out with an injury. Then Ben Utecht goes down with a separated shoulder. Then Gonzalez dislocates a finger and Jeff Saturday gets a knee sprain. Then Addai goes out in the second quarter with a knee problem and since Kenton Keith didn't even suit up that day (chest injury), T.J. Rushing is our running back for the rest of the game. Shortly after that, say Roy Hall (for irony's sake) goes down hard after a kickoff and has to leave on a stretcher. Think they'd stand much of a chance? I don't know, but that's what Houston faced on Sunday and they held up pretty darn well. Despite giving up two rushing TDs, they have a really good run defense. Expect a better fight from this team the next time we meet. Hopefully the Colts will have improved by then.

Speaking of rushing touchdowns. That one from Addai was flippin' sweet! The picture above speaks a thousand words and I'm sure you'll see it all over the place. Even better than a picture is the actual footage. Enjoy.

Friday Fun: The Impossible Quiz

If you've never played The Impossible Quiz, or its successor, The Impossible Quiz 2, then urine for a treat. I love little mind games and puns and such, and these quizzes are full of them. I think the Impossible Quiz 2 is better, so you should start with the first one. That way you'll enjoy it more. You have to think outside the box and sometimes nothing really makes sense at all. Both of them are pretty tough. Actually, I haven't even gotten to the end of either of them. Anyways, if you need a little break on your Friday, check them out.

Here's an example of one question: "How do you make Varnish disappear?" Think you know the answer? Prove it.

The Impossible Quiz
The Impossible Quiz 2

"Don't Taze Me Bro!"

Chris just sent us all a link of the University of Florida student who got tasered at a John Kerry political rally (thanks Chris!). If you haven't seen the video, check it out. I'm posting one here, but there are a few more that give different angles and stuff.

Yes, the guy is stupid and yes the cops were stupid. The thing I'm interested in is seeing how viral this phrase gets: "Don't taze me bro! Don't taze me!" Watch near the end of the video as the student begs for mercy. It's not funny, but I cracked up at it. Then, a number of people commented on the phrase. I'm guessing it's a matter of time before it becomes a phenomenon. Anyways, enjoy.

Weekend Update: Happy Birthday to Me

Well it was another perfect weekend in Indianapolis. I seriously love the fall season. When I lived in southern California, the only thing I didn't like about the weather was not having fall. Or thunderstorms.

I had yet another birthday on Saturday. Not much to say there, except I'm one of those people who doesn't really enjoy getting older. I still can't grow a full beard and show little signs of balding, so it's not too depressing yet.

One notable thing about my birthday is that I changed phone numbers recently and apparently forgot to tell everyone. Anyways, some lucky girl got a lot of calls this weekend to wish her a happy birthday. Just for fun, you should call 317, 938, 3323 and ask for Art. Let me know how annoyed she is.

The Colts won a tough game that shouldn't have come down to the wire. Why didn't they call a timeout on that last drive of the first half? And why didn't they run after the two minute warning at the end of the game? I will say that it's nice to know that the defense can come up with a stop when we need it. We got a win, so I won't complain too much.

The rest of my weekend can be summed up within this jumbled mess of my thoughts:
Men's Group, man-pong, poker, Stroh's, hot tub, washers, Scruff cameo, birthday, grits, church, Colts win, balloons, family, beer, sunshine, beer.

Last year I had a much more entertaining post, which you should read here:
City Boy Goes Camping

And don't forget that tomorrow is Talk Like a Pirate Day

The New England Patriots Are Cheating Cheaters, Who's Next?

By now I'm sure you all know that the Patriots are cheating bastards. They have violated league rules by videotaping defensive signals given by the New York Jets in last Sunday's "victory." This is surely not the first time they have done this, but it appears this time there is evidence to support the facts and now the commissioner will have to deal with it.

This is upsetting to me on a number of levels. First of all, the Patriots really are one of the best teams in the NFL. On an individual level, they outmatch just about every other team at almost any position. Everyone in that organization is really talented at what they do. They are the last team that needs to resort to spying in order to win.

If I'm a Pats fan, I'm even more disgusted by this. If I'm a player, I'm extra pissed off. Consider this response from Patriot cornerback Ellis Hobbs when the allegations first came out:

We put too many hours in as individuals and a team to have to go out and cheat. If it's true, obviously, we're in the wrong. But I'm standing behind my team, my coaches. I don't think we do that stuff.

Can you imagine how pissed you would be after making a statement like that in support of your team?

So hopefully Roger Goodell will come down with the harshest punishment possible. He has to. The damage has already been extensive and nothing is worse than damaging the integrity of the game. If we, as fans, can't be certain that everyone is playing on a level field, we're not going to buy into this game. And I love the game. I hate crap like this, even if it does confirm that the Patriots are the cheating cheaters who we always knew them to be.

The other frustrating thing is that even after the punishment is done, there's no way to repair the damage. I'm still upset that more wasn't done about Shawne Merriman. I mean, the guy gets busted for using steroids after winning the NFL Defensive Rookie of the Year award and going to the Pro Bowl the previous year. So he gets a little 4-game suspension and is a starter in the Pro Bowl that same year? That is absurd to me. How can you support that? Jose Canseco, Mark McGuire, Barry Bonds- these guys had their reputation and their legacy basically ruined by steroids and ruined the integrity of their game. But a hot Pro Bowl linebacker does the same thing and is as popular as ever. He's still endorsed by all the biggest corporate sponsors and is even lucky enough to be in the best NFL commercial so far this year. It's just not right.

The ridiculous thing in both cases is that neither team needed the extra cheating. San Diego still went on to have the best record in the NFL, even with those four games Merriman was out. And the Patriots should never have to cheat to beat the Jets.

The thing that scares me the most is this. Those two teams are the cream of the NFL crop. And which team has the best regular season record in the NFL since 1999? Yep. The Indianapolis Colts. It seems a bit naive to me to think they've done that without bending any rules. Personally, I don't think they have. I seriously believe that integrity and character is more important to this franchise than wins and losses. But I also know that sometimes the people you least expect, are the ones dirtying up the laundry.

Great Start: Colts 1-0

Game 1: Colts 41, Saints 10. Not much to say about last night's game, except that it was AWESOME! We had a lot of fun watching the game and I love when the Colts win early in the week, then we just get to sit back and enjoy the rest of the games on Sunday. Sweetness.

The defense really does look good. This game should've been a shutout. The only points scored were off of a fumble return and a couple missed tackles on a punt return. I sure hope this is a sign of things to come and not just reflective of the fact that New Orleans played terribly. Seriously, that's the only bad news here. They did not play well at all. The good news is that we took advantage of that. I can remember the days when the Colts always seemed to play up to, or down to, their opponent's level. Not last night. And that's a good sign.

My favorite quote of the night? Madden: "If you start out holding him in a legal position, when it becomes illegal, it's still legal."

Notable Notes: Manning's 100th win (including playoffs). Brees almost sets the NFL record for least yards per pass (4.7?).

My hopes are high, dangit. GO HORSE!

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year!

First of all, make sure you have the sound on so you can relive the glory (hopefully it's working). Second of all, I shouldn't be at work today. Third of all, I don't think I've ever been this excited about a season opener for the Colts. Skip the next couple paragraphs if you don't want to hear idiotic ramblings about the upcoming game.

A few brief thoughts about the game: All excitement aside, this game really may be one of the least significant as far as our schedule goes. It's early in the season, against a non-division, non-conference opponent. It's going to feel like a playoff game, but without playoff ramifications.

The Colts will need to do all the normal things to win. Limit the big plays, contain the running game, no mistakes, yada yada yada. There are really only two ways the Colts can lose: Give up huge yardage and big plays on special teams (like if the Saints have +20-30 yards starting field position), lose the turnover battle by more than -1. It will be a tough game regardless, but the Colts should pull this one off.

The crowd is going to be ridiculous. We're hanging the banner tonight and having concerts and everyone's still buzzing from that last AFC Championship game. The Dome is going to be crazy loud. I don't think the Saints have much experience in the kind of atmosphere they're going to have in this season opener. The last time they experienced an angry mob of fans, they got spanked by Chicago. This should be a good learning experience for them. Having said all that, the Colts better show up and show up early, because if New Orleans gets a big lead, we're screwed. Anyways, it'll be a good game.

What I've already realized before we even have the pre-game festivities, is that Colts games will never be the same again. By winning the Super Bowl, these Colts have changed the city. They've turned non-fans into die-hards, and those of us who were die-hards before now have an extra sense of pride. To quote a certain tattoo artist after he completed his work, "That's something they can't never repo from your ass."

I've already spent the past few days looking back at the month of January and the first few weeks of February. Man, that was fun. If you've got the time, enjoy a little trip down memory lane:

Colts in the Super Bowl? A prediction of what I believe was the only scenario that could have gotten the Colts into the Super Bowl.

Colts vs. Bears: Super Bowl XLI. Our experience of the greatest game in Colts history.

Act Like You've Been There Before. A post-AFC Championship game encounter with a Pats fan downtown.

Super Bowl Celebration. A few pictures from our Super Bowl Party.

And the video from our Super Bowl Party. In case you haven't seen it. Man, it was awesome. I like how my wife plows through at the end.