Monday, July 02, 2007

MySpam #9: "Cleanse Colon"

It's been awhile since I've found a piece of MySpam worthy enough to add to my list. Today I found a nice steaming pile of spam in my inbox and knew exactly where to shove it.

The email came from "Cleanse Colon" with a subject line of: "Cleanse Your Colon of Excess Weight." When I opened up the email, I found this awesome picture:

The funniest thing about this picture is not the fact that they're trying to sell pooping as a way to lose weight. But that is funny.

The funniest thing is that they photoshopped a thumb onto that lady's hand. Go ahead and make a fist like the nice lady in the photo is doing. Now try to somehow make a "thumb's up" like she is. It's not possible. And her thumb is gigantic. I hope they aren't suggesting you have to use a thumb when cleansing your colon. I'm sure this poor woman had no idea she would be used as an advertisement for a free colon cleansing, but you never know.

The bonus to this miracle pill is that not only will it clean out your colon of up to 20 pounds (I do this on a daily basis), but it also eliminates toxins. This is a fancy way of saying, "take a big fat dump to lose weight."

If I'm White Castle, I'm starting to get a little nervous. Somebody finally discovered the secret ingredient to Sliders and put them in a pill form.

Actually, it's probably not a pill, but I'm too scared to click on the link to see what they're actually selling. Probably just a giant thumb appendage.


Anonymous said...

I clicked the link to see and it was just a screen that says, "you are an idiot" adn laughs at you. Maybe it's just a big joke?

Chris said...

So I guess my new diet plan should be drinking coffee then! Coffee makes you get up and go... in more than one way...

It's probably just a virus or malware. I wouldn't click on anything from an e-mail that wasn't from someone I knew, unless I was on a computer who's owner I didn't like.

As scary as it looks, I can actually do that with my thumb. Granted, I don't have giant long fingers like that woman...